On the road to become a hairless persian
Whoooo I'm stressed. REALLY stressed. Wanna see the schedule today?
6-2pm sch
-found out last minute have cheer practice. Din even have PE attire
3.30-6.20pm cheer practice
7pm-8pm E Maths Tuition
8.30pm-9.30pm A Maths Tuition
Yup... cheer. I can't dance for nuts and I keeps screwing up my dance moves. It sucks. A lot. And I don't have time to practice. SOME MORE I HAVE A BLOODY A MATHS CA TOMORROW! Yup, the FatCat's on the road to become a hairless persian.
Recipe to baldness:
10 cups of stress
1/2 teaspoon of clumsiness
6 vials of lactic acid to cause muscle cram
3 buckets of pain for being stepped on in cheer
60 tonnes of unfinished due homework
100 grams of oh-so-little-time
Mix them together and you'd get a bald persian.
Plus I have to get contacts for cheer. Hm. And the girl told me to get ask for a sample from the optician and lie that I want to try out contacts cause I'm interested and buying. And I got humiliated in front of the whole cheer squad when they found out I got a boyfriend. Ho-hun. Its odd that the earth doesn't just open up and swallow you whole when you just want it too. Or at least, not as odd as Marian beatin every single huge suspcious fly-cum-bee to death with her oh-so-powerful SOCIAL STUDIES BOOK! I knew those books were lethal. So, how am I going to ask for a sample. I've thought of a few case scenarios when I was bathing.
Case scenario one:
M:Hi, I would like to try out contacts because I'm interested in buying. Can I have a sample?
Store Dude:No. We're closing. Have a nice day.
M: -stands outside shop and curses- !%&#$(#^!@&!(
Worst case scenario for this: I end up kicking the damn shop door out of anger and injure my foot.
Case scenario 2:
M:Hi, I would like to try out contacts because I'm interested in buying. Can I have a sample?
Store Dude:Don't be so Singaporean la! We know you're just trying to fleece us!
M:Well, THANKS A LOT BUSTER! I'm just asking for a damn SAMPLE! Is it THAT hard just to spare me one?! Huh?! It's not like I HAVE a choice either you know! You think I enjoy prancing around in oh-so-short skirts in the blazing hot sun while you sit on your fat ass here, enjoy aircon and even get paid for it?! -glares-
Store Dude:-looks quite terrified-
Worst case scenorio:Store Dude chases me outta the shop and I STIL don't get my contacts.
Case scenario 3:
M:Hi, I would like to try out contacts because I'm interested in buying. Can I have a sample?
Store Dude: SURE! We always treat our customers with the BEST service! Would you like the blue one? Or the green one? Actually I think the olive one's nicer but then again the violet's GORGEOUS don't you think? Looks a bit like lavender. Ooooo I LOVE Lavender! It smells like heaven! Then again for your face I think a brown one would be nicer-"
M:-looks scared- t-thanks... I think I got the wrong shop.... bye now!
Worst case scenario: Get dragged by crazy store dude and get tortured and STILL don't get my contacts.
Case scenario 4:
M:-slams onto the counter- ALRIGHT! THAT'S ENOUGH! THE SAMPLE CONTACTS OR YOUR LIFE!!!! -brandishes penknife-
Store Dude: HAHAHAHAHA! nice fake. Now what do you REALLY want?
M:.....=.=""" -stabs clerk- -runs away-
Worst case scenario: Gets caught by police and charged for murder and STILL don't get my contacts.
Case scenario 5:
M:-frantically runs into shop- PLEASE HELP! MY GRANDMOTHER'S DYING!!! Oh kind soul would you do me the favor of granting her last wish?
Store Dude:-chews on donut- ehhh?
M:SHE WANTS TO WEAR CONTACTS JUST BEFORE SHE DIE!!! OH PLEASE SPARE ME JUST ONE AND GRANT A POOR DYING LADY'S WISH?!
Store Dude:Sorry but I can't give freebees. Nice try though.
M:-GLARES- -grabs store dude's neck and stuffs donut down- -clerk chokes and dies- -looks around and exclaims loudly to the people around- I TOLD YOU THOSE THINGS GO STRAIGHT TO YOUR ASS! -grabs contacts and run-
Worst case scenario:Gets caught by police and STILL don't get to USE my contacts!
BEST Case scenario ever:
M:Hi, I would like to try out contacts because I'm interested in buying. Can I have a sample?
Store Dude:Sure. Take a look at our range. Just pick any.
M: -picks-
Store Dude: Thank you have a nice day.
M: -beams- thank you. you too. -runs out of the shop laughing like a maniac-
However... we know that this BEST case scenario is almost impossible....
25% on the way to being a hairless Persian....
6-2pm sch
-found out last minute have cheer practice. Din even have PE attire
3.30-6.20pm cheer practice
7pm-8pm E Maths Tuition
8.30pm-9.30pm A Maths Tuition
Yup... cheer. I can't dance for nuts and I keeps screwing up my dance moves. It sucks. A lot. And I don't have time to practice. SOME MORE I HAVE A BLOODY A MATHS CA TOMORROW! Yup, the FatCat's on the road to become a hairless persian.
Recipe to baldness:
10 cups of stress
1/2 teaspoon of clumsiness
6 vials of lactic acid to cause muscle cram
3 buckets of pain for being stepped on in cheer
60 tonnes of unfinished due homework
100 grams of oh-so-little-time
Mix them together and you'd get a bald persian.
Plus I have to get contacts for cheer. Hm. And the girl told me to get ask for a sample from the optician and lie that I want to try out contacts cause I'm interested and buying. And I got humiliated in front of the whole cheer squad when they found out I got a boyfriend. Ho-hun. Its odd that the earth doesn't just open up and swallow you whole when you just want it too. Or at least, not as odd as Marian beatin every single huge suspcious fly-cum-bee to death with her oh-so-powerful SOCIAL STUDIES BOOK! I knew those books were lethal. So, how am I going to ask for a sample. I've thought of a few case scenarios when I was bathing.
Case scenario one:
M:Hi, I would like to try out contacts because I'm interested in buying. Can I have a sample?
Store Dude:No. We're closing. Have a nice day.
M: -stands outside shop and curses- !%&#$(#^!@&!(
Worst case scenario for this: I end up kicking the damn shop door out of anger and injure my foot.
Case scenario 2:
M:Hi, I would like to try out contacts because I'm interested in buying. Can I have a sample?
Store Dude:Don't be so Singaporean la! We know you're just trying to fleece us!
M:Well, THANKS A LOT BUSTER! I'm just asking for a damn SAMPLE! Is it THAT hard just to spare me one?! Huh?! It's not like I HAVE a choice either you know! You think I enjoy prancing around in oh-so-short skirts in the blazing hot sun while you sit on your fat ass here, enjoy aircon and even get paid for it?! -glares-
Store Dude:-looks quite terrified-
Worst case scenorio:Store Dude chases me outta the shop and I STIL don't get my contacts.
Case scenario 3:
M:Hi, I would like to try out contacts because I'm interested in buying. Can I have a sample?
Store Dude: SURE! We always treat our customers with the BEST service! Would you like the blue one? Or the green one? Actually I think the olive one's nicer but then again the violet's GORGEOUS don't you think? Looks a bit like lavender. Ooooo I LOVE Lavender! It smells like heaven! Then again for your face I think a brown one would be nicer-"
M:-looks scared- t-thanks... I think I got the wrong shop.... bye now!
Worst case scenario: Get dragged by crazy store dude and get tortured and STILL don't get my contacts.
Case scenario 4:
M:-slams onto the counter- ALRIGHT! THAT'S ENOUGH! THE SAMPLE CONTACTS OR YOUR LIFE!!!! -brandishes penknife-
Store Dude: HAHAHAHAHA! nice fake. Now what do you REALLY want?
M:.....=.=""" -stabs clerk- -runs away-
Worst case scenario: Gets caught by police and charged for murder and STILL don't get my contacts.
Case scenario 5:
M:-frantically runs into shop- PLEASE HELP! MY GRANDMOTHER'S DYING!!! Oh kind soul would you do me the favor of granting her last wish?
Store Dude:-chews on donut- ehhh?
M:SHE WANTS TO WEAR CONTACTS JUST BEFORE SHE DIE!!! OH PLEASE SPARE ME JUST ONE AND GRANT A POOR DYING LADY'S WISH?!
Store Dude:Sorry but I can't give freebees. Nice try though.
M:-GLARES- -grabs store dude's neck and stuffs donut down- -clerk chokes and dies- -looks around and exclaims loudly to the people around- I TOLD YOU THOSE THINGS GO STRAIGHT TO YOUR ASS! -grabs contacts and run-
Worst case scenario:Gets caught by police and STILL don't get to USE my contacts!
BEST Case scenario ever:
M:Hi, I would like to try out contacts because I'm interested in buying. Can I have a sample?
Store Dude:Sure. Take a look at our range. Just pick any.
M: -picks-
Store Dude: Thank you have a nice day.
M: -beams- thank you. you too. -runs out of the shop laughing like a maniac-
However... we know that this BEST case scenario is almost impossible....
25% on the way to being a hairless Persian....
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