Try not to be wrong for her.
Have you ever encountered such a time when words just simply fail to express your emotions??
It's like you're caught in a torrent of words - so many, that you just can't extract the right ones to convey how you really feel because none of them just seem good enough. It sucks...
History Night: was really busy. Good job though T4, we pulled through..I guess it was pretty fun. Had dinner with some of the class and shared a cab back with Luo Er, Viggy and Sam.
Met up with the bitches: There's nobody else I'll actually cam-whore with to that extent other than you two ;)
Sports Carnival: Eco-challenge was more than I expected! Nonetheless, great effort everyone! I'll never forget the fun we had haha! Oh yeah, and me and Sam are no longer Dumb Bitches - we actually have IQ!!!
Sorry, I'm not really in the best of moods now to elaborate on anything.
So I'm just going to ramble now.
Isn't it so painfully ironic to look into someone and find that person not really the person you have perceived? Then, again, maybe the mind purposely constructs such false images and superimposes them just for the sake of self-denial. The truth is always so much harder to take. And I'm not someone who can accept harsh reality sometimes. Perhaps I've been living on dreams too much?
Blissful ignorance.
As painful as it seems, I feel as if I just got electrocuted again - so awake, yet, so asleep.
Inertia, the reluctance of the body to move in the press of motion. We learnt that in physics, a long time ago. Maybe I've been expecting too much? Clinging onto such false hope that died along with you? Perhaps the "you" I've been superimposing onto you is already dead?
History night should have taught me something about the past. You can repeat your mistakes but anything that's of the past, stays as it.
True, I can always dive back into my escapism mentality and fantasize about being a child again where I was carefree and could lean onto your shoulder without worrying about any wrong intentions or consequences. But, I'm going to have to stop thinking that way. No more romanticism, no more indealistic thinking because life ain't even patronising enough to allow that.
No more "Boston" moments for me.
I guess you woke me up. Maybe when time passes, I'll understand. How you wouldn't even recognise me when I passed you (or was it deliberate ignorance?), how one moment you can be so friendly and the next moment so cold (or were you affected by the gossip)? I really don't know. In fact, I don't know what to think.
She said,
You don't know me,
You don't wear my chains... (Boston)
This.... has to stop. Now. No matter what it takes.
So cut out your flesh and draw a beautiful potrait with your blood...the most beautiful in the world.
And you know, I thought I'd cheer myself up. I tried watching Tengen Toppa Gurren Lagaan but I only ended up depressing myself more. In the anime, the guy who was the coolest ended up dying just after he had promised the girl that he'd come back for her and return 10x of the one kiss that she gave to him just before he marched to battle... and after he died, I realised that the opening videos opted out the showcase of him. Even at the end of the opening video, he's now erased from the group shot.
So, I think. I think, therefore I am.
But what is the proof of my existence? Like the main character, no matter how respected you are or how accomplished, we'll disappear from the world. Years down the road, who is going to live in my house and will that occupant actually walk into each and every room and wonder what the previous occupant was like? I used to think we'll live on in memories but memories are all reconstructions of something that wasn't really, all that.
Memories are glorified or dumbed down. I just learnt that I can't trust any of them. Dwelling too much on them can kill you. I'm not going to watch finish that anime. I can't accept that life goes on as normal after someone's gone.
Because, I know that, since you didn't even recognize me today, you wouldn't even realize if I were dead tomorrow.
Quote of the day: "Don't believe in me for believing in you. Believe in yourself for believing in you."
Thought of the day: Somehow, you'll always have a special place in my memories and my heart - just like everyone else from the 6-7pm group.
It's like you're caught in a torrent of words - so many, that you just can't extract the right ones to convey how you really feel because none of them just seem good enough. It sucks...
History Night: was really busy. Good job though T4, we pulled through..I guess it was pretty fun. Had dinner with some of the class and shared a cab back with Luo Er, Viggy and Sam.
Met up with the bitches: There's nobody else I'll actually cam-whore with to that extent other than you two ;)
Sports Carnival: Eco-challenge was more than I expected! Nonetheless, great effort everyone! I'll never forget the fun we had haha! Oh yeah, and me and Sam are no longer Dumb Bitches - we actually have IQ!!!
Sorry, I'm not really in the best of moods now to elaborate on anything.
So I'm just going to ramble now.
Isn't it so painfully ironic to look into someone and find that person not really the person you have perceived? Then, again, maybe the mind purposely constructs such false images and superimposes them just for the sake of self-denial. The truth is always so much harder to take. And I'm not someone who can accept harsh reality sometimes. Perhaps I've been living on dreams too much?
Blissful ignorance.
As painful as it seems, I feel as if I just got electrocuted again - so awake, yet, so asleep.
Inertia, the reluctance of the body to move in the press of motion. We learnt that in physics, a long time ago. Maybe I've been expecting too much? Clinging onto such false hope that died along with you? Perhaps the "you" I've been superimposing onto you is already dead?
History night should have taught me something about the past. You can repeat your mistakes but anything that's of the past, stays as it.
True, I can always dive back into my escapism mentality and fantasize about being a child again where I was carefree and could lean onto your shoulder without worrying about any wrong intentions or consequences. But, I'm going to have to stop thinking that way. No more romanticism, no more indealistic thinking because life ain't even patronising enough to allow that.
No more "Boston" moments for me.
I guess you woke me up. Maybe when time passes, I'll understand. How you wouldn't even recognise me when I passed you (or was it deliberate ignorance?), how one moment you can be so friendly and the next moment so cold (or were you affected by the gossip)? I really don't know. In fact, I don't know what to think.
She said,
You don't know me,
You don't wear my chains... (Boston)
This.... has to stop. Now. No matter what it takes.
So cut out your flesh and draw a beautiful potrait with your blood...the most beautiful in the world.
And you know, I thought I'd cheer myself up. I tried watching Tengen Toppa Gurren Lagaan but I only ended up depressing myself more. In the anime, the guy who was the coolest ended up dying just after he had promised the girl that he'd come back for her and return 10x of the one kiss that she gave to him just before he marched to battle... and after he died, I realised that the opening videos opted out the showcase of him. Even at the end of the opening video, he's now erased from the group shot.
So, I think. I think, therefore I am.
But what is the proof of my existence? Like the main character, no matter how respected you are or how accomplished, we'll disappear from the world. Years down the road, who is going to live in my house and will that occupant actually walk into each and every room and wonder what the previous occupant was like? I used to think we'll live on in memories but memories are all reconstructions of something that wasn't really, all that.
Memories are glorified or dumbed down. I just learnt that I can't trust any of them. Dwelling too much on them can kill you. I'm not going to watch finish that anime. I can't accept that life goes on as normal after someone's gone.
Because, I know that, since you didn't even recognize me today, you wouldn't even realize if I were dead tomorrow.
Quote of the day: "Don't believe in me for believing in you. Believe in yourself for believing in you."
Thought of the day: Somehow, you'll always have a special place in my memories and my heart - just like everyone else from the 6-7pm group.
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