A retard once said "Life's like a box of chocolates - you'll never know what you're gonna get".
However, life is not a box of chocolates. Chocolates don't turn around and bite you in the ass. Also, how could you not know what you're going to get? What box of chocolates is unlabelled?! Even if its those super cheapo brands which merely state 'mixed flavours/chocolate', you'd at least know that chocolate can only be bitter or sweet!
Life isn't about just bitter or sweet! There's sour, salty, bitter, sweet, somewhere between bittersweet and the occassional something that tastes so bad you can't identify it with any taste except that you're now glued to the toilet bowl and your ass feels like the parting of the Red Sea!
I think we learn and define our lives through experience. It's like staring at an open field of flowers everyday. Eventually everyone will have to jump into that field, roll around and familiarise yourself with it through rain or shine, snow or godzilla. Who knows? You might learn something - like how flowers make you sneeze, like how ants love crawling up your pants and how rolling in the grass is never ever advisable because you've just gotten yourself a whole head of dog poop. And that, the decision to even jump into that field is really really stupid and you're probably going to be ushered off to IMH.
But anyway! I've made up my mind. After so long, I finally have an ambition!
I want to be a...
Why a Cheeseburger?
1. Cheeseburgers have the easiest life! They just come in their lousy freezed/powdered-form packaging and there's a whole army of fast food stuff to assemble them together. You don't need to manage your own life. You just concentrate on being a cheeseburger.
2. Cheeseburgers are stubborn resilient piece of shits. Even though a cheeseburger is not unique at all and would lose out to Hamburgers, FishBurgers, BeefBurgers, Riceburgers, PortebelloMushroomBurgers, OctopusBurgers, Nattoburgers, RedbeanBurgers, Yamburgers, TaroBurgers, Sheepburgers, Breadburgers, CommunistBurgers, BrotherPaulBurgers, DemocraticBurgers, MilitaryBurgers, KetchupBurgers, MayonnaiseBurgers, EggBurgers, SeaweedBurgers, SausageBurgers, EelBurgers, OdexBurgers, DurianBurgers, JayChouBurgers and the most obscene TwilightBurger, cheeseburgers are always, always around!!!
A fast food joint is not a fast food joint without selling cheeseburgers!!!
Macdonalds isn't making small kids obscenely obese without cheeseburgers!!!
A study break at a fast food joint would be too expensive if not for the single $1.90 cheeseburger!!
A good-for-nothing, fat-loving, brainwashed consumer would not be a good-for-nothing, fat-loving, brainwashed consumer without the cheeseburger!!!
Pop stars cannot earn a popular image without posing with a cheeseburger!!!
Noooothing, I repeat- noooothing! Can replace the Cheeseburger! It's a stubborn son-of-a-cow and its there to stay!!!! The mountain may not come to Mohammad but Mohammad will go to the Cheeseburger!!!
3. Cheeseburgers are imperfect! Nobody expects anything of you! You just make people fatter and that's it! You can't rate a cheeseburger - cheeseburgers taste the same all the time! It's just a matter of my-patty-is-thicker-than-yours or my cheese-is-not-as-stale or MY-BREAD-HAS-MORE-SESAME-SEEDS!!! People accept you for who you are - the cheeseburger! Even though everyone knows that your patty is made up of cows eyeballs, nails and all the grounded shit your mother warned you about, that the lettuce probably has 1 litre of preservatives and insecticides in it, that the bread is probably been locked up and abandoned in a old warehouse in Zimbabwe for 10 years before its retrieved and served to you,those tomatoes are actually painted cardboard from China and that the Cheese is made from old saggy cow udders, THEY STILL LOVE IT!
Quote of the day: Your SON picked up the phone. ( WHY DOES EVERYONE FORGET IM A GIRL?! $&U%(@)($_@$ This is sore throat discrimination T__T )
I WANT TO BE A CHEESEBURGER!!! T_T
However, life is not a box of chocolates. Chocolates don't turn around and bite you in the ass. Also, how could you not know what you're going to get? What box of chocolates is unlabelled?! Even if its those super cheapo brands which merely state 'mixed flavours/chocolate', you'd at least know that chocolate can only be bitter or sweet!
Life isn't about just bitter or sweet! There's sour, salty, bitter, sweet, somewhere between bittersweet and the occassional something that tastes so bad you can't identify it with any taste except that you're now glued to the toilet bowl and your ass feels like the parting of the Red Sea!
I think we learn and define our lives through experience. It's like staring at an open field of flowers everyday. Eventually everyone will have to jump into that field, roll around and familiarise yourself with it through rain or shine, snow or godzilla. Who knows? You might learn something - like how flowers make you sneeze, like how ants love crawling up your pants and how rolling in the grass is never ever advisable because you've just gotten yourself a whole head of dog poop. And that, the decision to even jump into that field is really really stupid and you're probably going to be ushered off to IMH.
But anyway! I've made up my mind. After so long, I finally have an ambition!
I want to be a...
Why a Cheeseburger?
1. Cheeseburgers have the easiest life! They just come in their lousy freezed/powdered-form packaging and there's a whole army of fast food stuff to assemble them together. You don't need to manage your own life. You just concentrate on being a cheeseburger.
2. Cheeseburgers are stubborn resilient piece of shits. Even though a cheeseburger is not unique at all and would lose out to Hamburgers, FishBurgers, BeefBurgers, Riceburgers, PortebelloMushroomBurgers, OctopusBurgers, Nattoburgers, RedbeanBurgers, Yamburgers, TaroBurgers, Sheepburgers, Breadburgers, CommunistBurgers, BrotherPaulBurgers, DemocraticBurgers, MilitaryBurgers, KetchupBurgers, MayonnaiseBurgers, EggBurgers, SeaweedBurgers, SausageBurgers, EelBurgers, OdexBurgers, DurianBurgers, JayChouBurgers and the most obscene TwilightBurger, cheeseburgers are always, always around!!!
A fast food joint is not a fast food joint without selling cheeseburgers!!!
Macdonalds isn't making small kids obscenely obese without cheeseburgers!!!
A study break at a fast food joint would be too expensive if not for the single $1.90 cheeseburger!!
A good-for-nothing, fat-loving, brainwashed consumer would not be a good-for-nothing, fat-loving, brainwashed consumer without the cheeseburger!!!
Pop stars cannot earn a popular image without posing with a cheeseburger!!!
Noooothing, I repeat- noooothing! Can replace the Cheeseburger! It's a stubborn son-of-a-cow and its there to stay!!!! The mountain may not come to Mohammad but Mohammad will go to the Cheeseburger!!!
3. Cheeseburgers are imperfect! Nobody expects anything of you! You just make people fatter and that's it! You can't rate a cheeseburger - cheeseburgers taste the same all the time! It's just a matter of my-patty-is-thicker-than-yours or my cheese-is-not-as-stale or MY-BREAD-HAS-MORE-SESAME-SEEDS!!! People accept you for who you are - the cheeseburger! Even though everyone knows that your patty is made up of cows eyeballs, nails and all the grounded shit your mother warned you about, that the lettuce probably has 1 litre of preservatives and insecticides in it, that the bread is probably been locked up and abandoned in a old warehouse in Zimbabwe for 10 years before its retrieved and served to you,those tomatoes are actually painted cardboard from China and that the Cheese is made from old saggy cow udders, THEY STILL LOVE IT!
Quote of the day: Your SON picked up the phone. ( WHY DOES EVERYONE FORGET IM A GIRL?! $&U%(@)($_@$ This is sore throat discrimination T__T )
I WANT TO BE A CHEESEBURGER!!! T_T
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